(This post contains some sensitive material. I don’t want my words to upset anyone or trigger anything, but I am discussing birth control and sexual assault. Please be aware, and make the right choice on whether to continue reading.)
Just to startle myself back to the days when I didn’t use spell check on my blog, I reread last year’s post on Valentine’s Day. It’s not really worth going back to, unless you want to read my depressing rant on how every day sucks equally to Valentine’s Day when you’re single. Oh, and then I came out in the next post about my love for Penny, the puppy I used to live with. I can’t decide what’s worse: a borderline manic-depressive outlook on life in the month of February, or carefully veiled bestiality. Either way, before a suicide hotline calls me or I get arrested by the Humane Society, I want to take a different tone for 2/4/2012.
Congratulations everyone, we’ve made it this far in the year 2012. We’re not dead yet, and we have to get through get another V-Day. Ignoring the irony that this holiday can be abbreviated VD, I have mixed messages about this day. On one hand, I love the flowers my Dad sent my Mom on Saturday with the message “Why wait for Valentine’s Day?” Nausea aside for my parents being ‘that couple’, I see the other side of the spectrum. I won’t disclose names, but I know people who are planning to spend the day/night drunk with the hopes of picking up a random at their local bar. Or, you could just take the middle road—it’s just a normal day with an excess of pink and red hearts.
I never got the point of Valentine’s Day. It’s this one stupid day where everyone is supposed to be on better behavior in his or her relationship. Then again, I’ve always said this, but this is the first year I’m having a ‘real’ Valentine’s Day. Even though I make idiotic puns with his name (I call him ‘bath mat’ when he’s in the shower), Matt and I are determined to have a romantic Valentine’s Day. This entails heading out for a delicious meal of duck tonight and going on a ski trip this weekend. It combines all of my favorite things: game meat, rich white people sports, and, of course, Matt.
The thing is, even with all of these fun, albeit sappy, events, I can’t help but breakdown this holiday and turn it into something bigger than it is. What do people do on Valentine’s Day? Chances are, they’re having sex with someone that matters to them. It should be wonderful, worry-free, sex. Yet, if Conservatives have their way, Valentine’s Day sex might be ruined. That’s right, we live in a country where babies would be conceived on February 14th, instead of food baby conception from too much chocolate truffle consumption.
I am ticked off about the birth control debate in this country. It shouldn’t have to be an issue. At this moment, most of us, should we desire it, have access to a myriad of methods of contraception. This right is in danger. While I don’t believe that religious organizations should be forced to provide birth control if it goes against their doctrines, I also believe that this should be an accessible service that is provided to women by neutral health providers and ::gasp:: the government. The thing that most Conservatives don’t realize is that the small amount of money it takes to provide birth control is nothing in comparison to the cost it would take in welfare programs to help new mothers raise children they are not ready to have. Except for the fact they’re cutting these welfare programs too, basically telling women they have no support at all. All this from “pro-lifers”.
I know birth control is controversial. Ironically, I used to be very pro-life until I took my head out of my ass and realized that it doesn’t matter what I think. I don’t rejoice in abortions, but my opinions should in no way impact someone else’s choice. And I expect the same courtesy. Don’t tell anyone this secret but you can be pro-choice and never get an abortion. It’s extremely rare, but it is true—most pro-choice people are just fighting for abortion rights, not lining up to get one themselves.
When I hear morons like Rick Santorum say, “Many of the Christian faith have said, well, that’s okay, contraception is okay. It’s not okay. It’s a license to do things in a sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be”, I wonder what he thinks sex is supposed to be? Strictly for baby making? Once on the weekdays and twice on Sundays? Why does our country need people like Rick Santorum ruining sex? Oh right, because when you do get pregnant, it’s all a part of the Almighty’s plan.
When asked by CNN's Piers Morgan what he would do if his own daughter approached him, begging for an abortion after having been raped, Santorum explained that he would counsel her to "accept this horribly created" baby, because it was still a gift from God, even if given in a "broken" way. Good ol’ Tricky Ricky said:
"Well, you can make the argument that if she doesn't have this baby, if she kills her child, that that, too, could ruin her life. And this is not an easy choice, I understand that. As horrible as the way that that son or daughter and son was created, it still is her child. And whether she has that child or she doesn't, it will always be her child, and she will always know that.”
Santorum’s strategy is fighting trauma, with trauma. While I wish I could combat horrible crimes like rape with the quaint ‘when life gives you lemons, make lemonade’ approach, I can’t. Try as hard as I can this Valentine’s Day, Santorum’s words keep running through my head. Rick Santorum can never get pregnant against his will. Rick Santorum is not a woman. Yet, he feels he is somehow the chosen voice to speak on the issue of women’s health, or lack thereof. This man is running for President, and thousands of people are voting for him. Does anyone else see the horrible reality in this?
Therefore, as much as it is supposed to be a romantic day, I am turning February 14th into a day of activism and education for all of my friends and family on birth control and rape. These topics are poorly understood but widely discussed. Make the conscious effort to be informed about birth control. It may not be the right choice for you right now, but for others, it’s a lifesaver. Please, be aware that no matter what, it is a woman’s body. She has the right to have as much or as little sex as she wants, regardless of what Rick Santorum and others say.
I implore everyone to enjoy his or her sexuality in a safe and gratifying way this Valentine’s Day. I love you.
Great post! Happy Valentine's Day!
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